Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
Last night the nurse at the ER told me that she wished all her drunk patients were like me. Then she commented on my socks...
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
Randomize
