Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
Randomize
