D3 body, D1 cock
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
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