Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
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