Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
