That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
Randomize
