The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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