I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
I had a long pep-talk with my penis that ended in "I love you, I'll try harder and I'm sorry."
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
I think I just shit out all my problems.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
Randomize