I want to have your abortion
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
Randomize
