I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
Randomize
