the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
