Nicole vs. Life
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
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