it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
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