i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
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