what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
All I want is dick and wine.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
