So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
At least life still wants to fuck me.
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
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