jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
me + whiskey = a bad person
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
How dare sober me try to tell drunk me I can't eat the applesauce in the fridge! Stingy bitch IM EATING THE APPLESAUCE! you can tell sober me I said that.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
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