Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
Randomize
