But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
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