He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
