I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
Pants are for mortals
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
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