my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
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