im going to pretend im pregnant so i can eat a lot then i will accidentally fall down the stairs
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize