I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Randomize
