First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
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