So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
Randomize
