Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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