hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
They took my balls.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
Randomize
