i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
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