at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
Randomize