There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
My ass is underappreciated
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
Randomize
