Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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