Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
Randomize
