Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
apparently the officer said last night, "son, why don't you do yourself a favor and spread your legs so you don't keep vomiting on them". why can't I remember those nights?!
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
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