If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
Randomize
