It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Randomize
