We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
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