the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
