There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
Randomize
