he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
Shame - the story of my life.
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