I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
This couple is walking their pig around campus
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
Randomize
