Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
He felt like a one man threesome
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
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