I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
Randomize
