Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
