Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
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