hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
