Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
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