i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
Alive.
So much puke
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
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