What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
you texted me last night and told me you couldn't find the toilet.
That explains the puddle of pee in my closet.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
Just drug him and when he wakes up be like "you just woke up from a coma, we've been married for the past five years." It'll be like the Vow but fucked up.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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