I swear to god Optimus Prime and Megatron are fighting in my head right now.
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
